Friday, December 23, 2016

Hurry Up and ...Rush!

My single gal pals and I are noticing a new trend in dating men in 2016.  Anyone we have spoken to that has actually gotten to the point of wanting to meet, has been eager and excited to meet.  However, actually coordinating the time to meet up with these men has been exhausting.  And short lived.

I myself have limited free time after work, but I do have a few hours here and there through the work week for a 30-45 minute short meet and greet.  I also have weekends.  This short time frame usually suffices as a first meeting, as you can tell if there’s any attraction or connection fairly quickly.
Unfortunately, these men are so busy that they can’t even manage to find 45 minutes in 4 weeks to meet up.  The texting continues, the messaging, sometimes they even pick up the phone and make the call, but meeting in person seems to be almost impossible.  I realize that they are juggling several available women and some women are more interesting, but isn’t it better to meet up and cross people off the potentials list?  

Meet, you click or you don’t, go your separate ways and then either move onto the next candidate or decide to book a 1st real date with that person.  

I was texting with someone for about 4 weeks.  He kept trying to meet me but things kept getting in the way:  kids, working overtime, shopping, and other life events.  Finally, he picked a day, with 4 days notice and we booked a meeting at a coffee shop.  I was waiting for the “I’m sorry, I can’t make it” text.  It didn’t happen.  He told me he would be there at 4:45.
I arrived at the place and waited.  At 4:55 I messaged him and said “are you here yet?”  He replied that he would be there in 5 minutes.  Ok so now 4:45 turned into 5:05.  When he finally arrived, he was disheveled and in a whirlwind mess.  He said he was rushing and didn’t even have time to do his hair.  I was a bit confused because he knew about this “date” (first meeting) ahead of time.  We sat down and he did not look like his photos at all.  He was super skinny, haggard, with dark circles under his eyes, and had the gaunt look of a heavy drinker and the teeth of a man who hasn’t seen a dentist regularly, if at all.  

The most surprising part was that he became a superhero right before my eyes!  
Yes, he was indeed Captain Obvious.   
He kept blurting out things like “Oh what’s that?! on your tongue?!” right in the middle of my sentence (I have a tongue piercing).    
He also kept staring at my chest, which I could not figure out because I had on a sports bra aka uni-boob, a high cut shirt, a scarf over my chest and my jacket.  So Captain Obvious was obviously trying to use his X-ray vision to see through my 4 layers of clothing.  

At 5:12 he noted the time and said he had to leave in 5 minutes to go to see his parents.  They were expecting him.  Well, thank you Captain for saving me the grief of cutting this 1st meeting short.  I was just about to make up some excuse why I had to leave.  He beat me to it. 
He was very fidgety and nervous and kept asking if we could go out sometime.  “Umm, sure, yeah, sounds good” is what I said just to get myself the hell out of there.   If I had said no, explaining my reasons why not would’ve kept me there for a lot longer than a yes.    Just tell him what he wants to hear and get the hell out of Dodge!  

I said I needed to use the ladies room so that this toothless boozer dude wouldn’t try and kiss me goodbye.  As he bolted out of there in his old beat up Grand Am, I hid beside the window to make sure he was gone before I walked out.  

Rush rush rush!  Go go go! Our meeting lasted a total of 10 minutes but felt like a 2 hour root canal. 
And, these are some of the quality single men out there over the age of 44.     

Welcome to my hell.

This one is dedicated to Tanya, Heather, Michelle and Pam.  United we stand, united we laugh.

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